What!? It's been more than a year??

It's hard to believe it's been so long since I've updated this blog about my progress.

I'm sad to report that the HCG Protocol didn't work for me. At least not the way I had dreamed. HCG will help you lose weight, no doubt, but what it won't do is help you keep it off.

By last October, I was down a total of 80 pounds. Today, I'm only down about 30 pounds. In 6 months I gained back 50 pounds! Talk about a yo-yo! Not good, I know. I now see where my mistake was. It's the same thing that would've made having gastric bypass a big mistake. I hadn't learned how to eat right. Portion control was a foreign concept to me. Making a conscious decision to choose what I eat, versus what's available & fast, was something I hadn't fully grasped.

All along, I had planned to join Weight Watchers after I had lost most of the weight. I knew I had to learn some skills, I just didn't know I needed them before I began my HCG journey.

I've finally decided to get my act together, utilize the tools available to me, & try again. I don't consider my gaining back so much weight to be a failure. I know the only way I fail is if I give up & give in. I joined Weight Watchers a few months ago, went to a handful of meetings, saw exactly what I was paying for, deemed it a waste of money (who needs someone trying to sell me the next great thing in body sculpting? I'll pay for nutrition classes, but not to be sold a gadget or gizmo, thankyouverymuch), & I'm working the system on my own. I'm still doing the program, only I'm not paying for the meetings or the online tools I never would use.

I'm only down 12 pounds so far, but I wasn't really serious about until about a month ago. And progress is progress!

The best news is, I've had a change in the way I think about food. It's a turning point for me. "Food is fuel, not fun. " (kind of like another favorite saying "Fish are friends, not food", only without the fish. haha) I have committed myself to making better choices in the things I put in to my body & also my family members bodies. My 8 year old chose to be a vegetarian about 2 years ago, & I've decided he's on to something. So for the past 5 weeks I've been meat-free. I love seeing all the gorgeous colors of fruits & veggies that adorn my counter & I'm trying so many new things I never thought I'd try, let alone like!

Life is GOOD! :)

Enjoyed My First Steak Day!

Okay, so not really. Because who really wants to be forced to drink water until you're floating, then for dinner force down as much steak as you can stomach!? Not me, I learned yesterday. Not me.


During this phase of the protocol, a.k.a. Phase 3 (P3, for all you hcg'ers), if you go more than 2.1 pounds over your last injection weight (LIW), you have to do what's called a "steak day". Drink as much water as you can stand all day, then for dinner you have the largest steak you can find along with an apple or a raw tomato. The next morning, you'll find yourself back where you need to be.



I admit it worked. Really well, actually. I was down 2.8 pounds this morning, which is .4 pounds below my LIW. Now I know my body can't handle the two bowls of broccoli cheese soup I naughtily ate the day before I wound up with a steak day. Good to know. Though I kind of already guessed it might be a problem.

Realizations

This time last year, I was working towards jumping through all the hoops my insurance company required to approve the gastric bypass surgery I was hoping to have done. It felt like a long, arduous task, but I managed to make it through the required period of time & in to the doctor's office for the consultation.

While there, I spoke with a counselor who gave me some very good advice. She opened my eyes to something I hadn't truly considered before. If I wasn't ready to change my lifestyle, I would be doing myself a disservice by going forward with this surgery. All patients will lose weight. This was not the issue. The issue was unless I make a complete lifestyle change, spending at least 30 minutes a day in exercise, eating nutritious foods, being constantly conscious of what I put in to my body, I had better count on gaining almost all (if not all & then some, if history truly does repeat itself) the weight back within 5 years of this surgery.

I also realized gastric bypass is a last ditch effort. It's for people who have tried everything else, & nothing has worked. I realized it's taking the hard way out. Big time. I've watched three of my family members, who have had various versions of this surgery, deal with a plethora of side effects from a very serious problem with a stricture, to dumping (you don't want to know), to blood infections, to constant hunger... pretty much almost every possible side effect listed except death.

Knowing all this, I was still headed down that same road. I was sick & tired of being sick & tired all the time. I wanted to lose the weight so badly, yet every time I did I would quickly gain all of it back plus an extra 10 or 15 new "friends" would come join the party. I was willing to do just about anything to fix this.

After speaking with the counselor, I realized I had some "me" things to work on before I could go ahead with the surgery. This was last summer when I met with her. My next appointment in that office would have been for the post-op check up. I was so close to finally making this happen. It's what I'd been working towards for so many long months before! It was at that point I completely backed away from it. I needed to work on me. I couldn't go through with it, knowing I hadn't made that committment to a lifestyle change yet, only to cause myself further hardship by going through with the surgery. And I'm so glad I didn't go through with it.

Today, I realized something new. I don't qualify for the surgery anymore. With the work I've been doing, trying to get my life (weight, self-control, etc.) back in my own hands, I couldn't get my insurance company to pay for this surgery even if I wanted it! I don't meet the qualifications anymore. The only one I ever met was the one concerning BMI. Thankfully, I have no health conditions that would qualify me for this. That is to say, I didn't have them yet. With what I've been doing, my chances of dealing with those weight-related health issues have dropped dramatically. And the more I work, the less my chances are of EVER having to deal with them.

To me, this is much greater news than any number on the scale! For the first time in a long time, I feel like I know where I'm going. And I like it. :)

The price of deliciousness

Yesterday, I threw together a new recipe of some of my favorite (& allowable) things. I took a 14 oz. can of garlic chicken broth & added 3.5 ounces of chopped chicken, & about 1 cup of chopped, steamed asparagus, & some extra spices. It was DELICIOUS!!

Unfortunately, it caused me to gain a pound at this morning's weigh in. :(

I didn't think to check the sodium content until well after I ate it. Lesson learned. No more soup for me, unless I can find a mostly fat free & low sodium broth that isn't filled with MSG & other junk. While I find myself slightly bummed, I'm not surprised. I'm grateful for the lesson. :)